Lynch at Large

top ten reasons matt mooostain sucked in the us army all-american game:

10) was unsure whether to commit to the east or the west!
9) arms were tired from holding all those high school awards!
8) if those receivers were twelve feet tall, he'd have looked like a world beater!
7) didn't have his teddy to sleep with or damian williams to throw to!
6) rushers so in his face he could have touched them with a ten foot pole!
5) protecting french manicure!
4) ...they had the unmitigated gall to have other quarterbacks there, and they made them look good with that uncomplicated offense!
3) eyes blurry from reading his own press!
2) ...bright lights and a big city leads to a country boy throwing sh*ty!

and the #1 reason matt mooostain sucked in the us army all-american game: "helmet was waaaaaaaaaay too tight!"

# posted by Pat Lynch : 8:32 AM